Well, folks, it’s that time of year again: it’s getting a bit colder, a bit snowier (or, you know, just greyer in New York), and college students are coming up with creative places to hang mistletoe. I myself have started to celebrate by moving away from my normal litany of awful shows and onto shows in what might be one of the worst genres to have ever existed (the only genre that’s worse that I can think of is “Paranormal Teen Romance Novels”): Romantic Comedy Holiday Movies, often made by ABC Family. To give you an idea of how terrible this is, just consider that I have started about 12 of these movies and only got close to finishing three because they are just so, so horror-inducing.
The gem of the movies so far has been Christmas Cupid, which is just such a wonderful mix of stupidity and outright offensiveness that you can’t possibly watch it without some sort of ire burning inside of you like a freshly lit fireplace by the end. The premise of this movie is simple: a woman who has always put her career doing PR first is visited by three boyfriends of Christmas (Ex-mas, get it? GET IT?!) who tell her how she’s romantically stupid and what will happen if this continues. Her spiritual guide, the titled Christmas Cupid, is actually a hussy, diva, and former client who died while clubbing by choking on an olive. Continue reading
Being the politically active hippie I am, I have signed up for a good number of email updates from liberal PACs and candidates, including B. Rock — and this week something magical happened; Michelle Obama asked me on a date. Yes, me, Greg! Continue reading
First off, I’m sorry. This is another list. I swear I’m not only going to be making lists, it just turns out lists are easier to do than longer posts where you truly tell a story and make an argument and I need to post something lickety-split! So there you go.
One thing I’ve always been reprimanded for by my parents was my inability to make smalltalk. As I explained it to them, this was actually sort of logical: I believe that you shouldn’t try to make smalltalk with people about their jobs or school or whatnot because people generally tell you about what’s important to them. I sort of also based this on the fact that when I first started college I was actually just doing it because I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, so when people asked me about it my natural response was to growl. Unfortunately, doing things because they are logical don’t make them more socially acceptable. Right-o, Spock?