In the spirit of the holidays, over the next three weeks I am bringing you, my sparse readership, a gift. A gift that will linger in your minds far longer than any other gift I would’ve given you would (for the record, alternate gift ideas included head cheese and whatever has been growing in my closet). That’s right: four — you read correctly, four!!! — of my famous movie ideas* to enjoy in the privacy of wherever you’re reading this from.
*All famous movie ideas copyright Relatively Awesome Productions, Est. 2023. Stealing any of said ideas will result in punishment as seen fit by the Honorable Justice Gregory. Continue reading
First off, I’m sorry. This is another list. I swear I’m not only going to be making lists, it just turns out lists are easier to do than longer posts where you truly tell a story and make an argument and I need to post something lickety-split! So there you go.
One thing I’ve always been reprimanded for by my parents was my inability to make smalltalk. As I explained it to them, this was actually sort of logical: I believe that you shouldn’t try to make smalltalk with people about their jobs or school or whatnot because people generally tell you about what’s important to them. I sort of also based this on the fact that when I first started college I was actually just doing it because I had no idea what I wanted to do with my life, so when people asked me about it my natural response was to growl. Unfortunately, doing things because they are logical don’t make them more socially acceptable. Right-o, Spock?