One man's attempt at literacy

Tag Archives: Sex

(Did you like that pun I opened up with? No? Too bad!)

Yesterday I saw two James Bond movies at a local theater, Goldfinger and Dr. No. While watching these movies, I realized a few things, and that is that all James Bond and spy movies in general need 7 (well, sometimes 6) things to be successful. I want to catalog these out because I’m the reboot of Captain Obvious.

1) Signature┬áDrink: The first thing any good spy needs is his own signature drink. 007 likes, of course, a vodka martini, shaken, not stirred. There’s actually been a lot of clamor about the latest Bond film, Skyfall, because they sold out and he will be drinking Heineken for $45 million. This is problematic on two levels: on one hand, his signature drink is a vodka martini; but, more importantly, his signature drink is manly. Continue reading


As I mentioned in an earlier post, I’ve been working for a political campaign. Unfortunately, on Tuesday my candidate lost the primary election, meaning I’m now even more unemployed than before. Yay! As you can guess, my fleeting dreams of fleeing hobodom have made me rather melancholy, because I like money.

Money is what you use to buy food. Food is what you eat. I like eating.

I could not have found a better picture for my love of food, or a better source…

Continue reading